Monday's Musings - thoughts on FORGIVENESS

* as i sit and think about the past year and try to compact the things that i have learned, i think i can say the biggest thoughts/changes have been that of forgiveness.  for so many years, i saw forgiveness as forgetting what had happened in the past and just ignoring it.  but as i have looked more and more into what forgiveness is, i am realizing that i had a completely wrong perception of what forgiveness was

* i saw forgiveness as something i was doing/giving to another person.  it is in fact, something i am doing for myself.  a gift i am giving to myself.  a gift of freedom and release to and for myself.  here are some of the thoughts, quotes and meanderings that i have accumulated about forgiveness over the past several months

~ forgiveness does NOT require an apology (or another person). RECONCILIATION requires another person.

~ "Forgiveness is giving up my right to get even"  charles stanley

~  Forgiveness is a promise not a feeling.  When you forgive other people, you are making a promise to yourself not to use their past against them.

~  Forgiveness doesn't excuse their behaviour.  Forgiveness prevents their behaviour from destroying YOUR heart.

~ "Forgiveness is giving up your right to hold someone accountable for their sin against you.  It DOESN'T mean that you are letting them off the hook.  It means that you are setting yourself free from the pain and anger that has connected you to them for so long.  When you choose to forgive, it does not mean you will forget what happened, rather it means that the event will no longer have the same emotional control over you that it used to have.  Forgiveness releases the power of God to bring healing into the wounded places of your heart."  Grant Mullen from the book EMOTIONALLY FREE

~ you forgive someone for YOU - for YOUR benefit, not for them.

I can't say that this has been an easy process.  and i still struggle with thinking that forgiveness means "it's all better and fixed" because it doesn't.  it just means that i am not letting the black ugliness of the situation take hold of my present life.  

*  i want to live in the joy of right now, rather than in the pain of the past.

* just some thoughts i wanted to share with you and i mused about the past and the future. . . 

blessings on your day - and may you find forgiveness in the situations you find yourself in today